Being a provider once meant income; now it's income plus presence minus apology. You're allowed to adjust the formula until your house feels lived-in.

The thought behind it

Two quantities are set side by side, and the comparison does the arguing so the sentence does not have to. Family reads care as a debt meant to move forward rather than back — a continuation, not a repayment. “18” is doing the work: it is where the line stops describing you and starts asking something.